The Dreaded ESL

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The Dreaded ESLI am so glad that I don’t have to learn English as a second language. I was helping out as a teacher for a short while teaching spelling to 8 year olds and when we came to homophones they were perplexed, trying to puzzle out why “to, too, and two” existed in the same language; why “would” is correct and so is “wood”.Their young, very elastic minds will grasp all the concepts and enjoy (hopefully) the full richness of English, the “Lingua Franca” of this age.They won’t even get to contronyms for another couple semesters. That’s a neighborhood where things get a bit wacky.

I grew up listening to “rock” (music), but it can be something I might skip on a lake, it might be something huge and immovable, and it can be something that changes everything…As in: “Covid-19 rocked 2020 to its core”. It “spliced” our economy into splinters and yet fastened it together via a little thing called “zoom” which in early 2019 was an obscure competitor to skype et al. I’m certain that the zoom “stakeholders” were as happy as their bet paid off and, here we get to the guys holding the stakes on a bet and that doesn’t even begin to talk about two people setting up a tent with one holding the stake that gets pounded into the ground…and change one letter and keep the sound the same? Well, heck, that’s dinner! After a while we wanted to “refrain” from staying home and visting via zoom, but the sad old “refrain” kept on repeating (as “refrains” often do)- as we are still (at least those of us not in Texas) …zooming. And I don’t mean to “flog” Zoom…it’s all that kept us sane (or what passes for sane in early 2021 as I write this), but because we are all now continually staring at whatever google brought to you after your search, the internet has become The Place to “flog” ideas and products; exponentially more in the last 12-14 months. The people who want to sell us things know where our eyes are: They are stuck “fast” to the screen, while “we ‘fast” or snack as our life is fleetingly fast and today is rapidly yesterday. See? This is why I am glad I don’t have to learn English after learning almost any language. Can you see explaining these concepts to kids?

Okay now picture explaining the same things to your Gramma!

   

About Zaslow Crane

Zaslow Crane wrote his first Science fiction story when he was 11 This was after an uncle had given him a Charmin case full of sci fi paperbacks- all the old masters: A.E.Van Vogt, Cordwainer Smith, Heinlen, Bradbury, and dozens more. After that, he never looked back. Zaslow Crane has contributed to numerous magazines and newspapers over many years, and has been a contributing editor for a national magazine. He has been published a couple hundred times for non fiction. Regarding fiction, he writes primarily SciFi and was one of the creative talents behind Smoke and Mirrors, a parsec nominated podcast that "re-imagined" the Twilight Zone and, which ran for 2 1/2 years. He has written over two hundred short stories, 7 or 8 novellas and two novels, one of which "explains" a great many advancements in human technology. He likes mindless sort of work, because it frees that other part of his brain to work on story ideas, so if you see him, say, digging a ditch, you'll know that he’s really writing. He lives in a tiny house on a hill in Central California. His home overlooks the ocean - IF you're willing to stand on tip toes and crane your neck. Just a bit.